Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Please Drink Responsibly

Have you seen the new Budweiser ads? The skydiving ones? Well, in case you haven't...

There's some guys jumping out of an airplane. And the first guy goes, but then the second guy is afraid to jump. So the jumpmaster thinks he'll convince the guy by chucking a six-pack of Bud out the plane's door, which I'm sure is totally safe for the folks below. It doesn't work, but the plane's heretofore unseen pilot is so nuts for beer that he runs out of the cockpit and jumps out of the plane, without a parachute, after the beer. The guy who was afraid to skydive and the jumpmaster look at each other, bewildered, and then look at the cockpit, suddenly aware that no one's flying the plane.

Then the commercial ends. With a disclaimer. "Please drink responsibly."

Ex-cuuuuse me??!! You freakwads just showed me a guy committing suicide over a case of beer, and you're telling me to be responsible? Fuck you, Budweiser! From now on, I'm drinking till my liver tries to physically escape from my gastrointestinal tract.

That was probably Budweiser's intent in the first place.

By the way, have you seen Budweiser's website? You've gotta be twenty-one or older to enter the site, so there's this splash screen where they ask you for your birthdate. Like that's fooling anyone, as if there's sixteen-year-olds in America who've masterminded schemes to get themselves fake ID's, but — oh no! — what date to I need to put in to get into the Budweiser website?