This afternoon, I found what promises to the best direct-to-video B-movie ever in Palmer Video. It's called "Moto X Kids," so it's pretty clear that this alleged abomination is the product of a committee composed solely of middle-aged white guys who know nothing about motorcross or kids. No matter. We see from the cover that this movie stars Lorenzo Lamas, a hot chick, and an ape riding a motorcycle. So it's like "Renegade," but with a hot chick. Hotter than Lorenzo, I mean.

I gotta think this isn't one of Lorenzo's proudest moments, seeing how he lost his spot on the cover to a chimp.

As if this isn't awesome enough, the Internet Movie Database informs us that "Moto X Kids" also stars Joe Millionaire Evan Marriot and Gary Busey, who might or might not play the monkey.