Ceviche

I found a recipe for scallop ceviche in my cookbook and "cooked" it up for dinner tonight, despite my mother's numerous reservations. Ceviche, if you're unfamiliar, is a staple of the raw food diet; instead of cooking the fish, you marinate it in lemon juice, orange juice, and lime juice for several hours. The citric acid breaks down the proteins in the fish, like heat would, and you're left with a meal with the texture and bacterial risk of home-made sushi.

The ceviche, parasites aside, was hardly a challenge to my incredibly-modest culinary skills. Step (1): Put fish in bowl. Step (2) Pour citrus juices over fish. Step (3): Cover with tin foil. Step (4) Put bowl, fish, juices, and tin foil in refrigerator until fish turns white. Step three is the most difficult, but the whole process is only a few notches harder than toasting Pop-Tarts.

In any case, the ceviche came out okay. Mind-blowingly citrus.

I'm happy to be able to use the phrase "mind-blowingly citrus" in a context that isn't an ad for Starburst.