Does Anyone Know How To Use A Bidet?

There's this weird little floor sink thing in my bathroom and I'm eighty to ninety percent sure that's the bidet. I'm also eighty to ninety percent sure of what it's used for, but I'm not really familiar with how exactly one is used. I decided to try it out in what seemed like the most logical fashion: I straddled the damn thing and directed the stream of water (it's actually pretty powerful) towards... well, you know. Long story short: I'm still not certain that I'm using it correctly, but HOW DID THIS NOT CATCH ON IN AMERICA??!! It's awesome! It's cold and tickling, and like all the things your girlfriend won't do for hygeine reasons. Man, when I get home, I am so letting the shower do me doggie-style.