Time Management

I have zero time management skills. Can anybody help me out with some advice on how to cram maybe twenty-six or twenty-eight hours into my day? I don't mean the common stuff, like action plans or setting goals and priorities and putting them to paper. And I'm certainly not talking about cutting back on four hours of TV and four separate hours of porn I look at every day (sometimes they're not separate). Along with my hour and a half commute each way, I don't get a whole lot of sleep.

But I say that, no cutting into fun time, without being ingenuous or sardonic. For instance, I caught that Amy Winehouse video on VH1 — the one where she's a dazed whore, writhing on the floor to an awesome beat — and those four hours of TV a day clicked with me for a second. In between partying, getting soused, snorting coke, and recovering from partying, getting soused, and snorting coke, where does she find the time to film a video? Not to mention writing, recording, performing, and drinking more.

Point is, it's possible. I've read that Stephen Covey self-help crap: put first things first, but his advice was either too inane or not inane enough to be helpful. (The big problem I run into is the First Thing gets tripped up in Murphy's Law, and once the whole mess is worked out, there's not enough time for the Second and Third Things.) So, ideas?