Wednesday, May 17, 2006

I ran into a bit of an underpants situation this morning... namely, I had no underpants. Laundry takes at least an hour and a half from soak cycle to spin dry, and I had a train to catch. During crises like this, I find guidance and wisdom from a classic acronym, four simple letters: WWMD. What Would MacGyver Do? I first asked myself what would Jesus do, but then I thought that people probably didn't wear underpants back in the year zero A.D., so this would be a moot point for Jesus. I guess also don't know for sure that MacGyver wore (wears?) underpants either, not that I'm dying to find out or anything, but I'm just going with it for my story.

I decided that MacGyver would probably fashion some sort of skidmark-scrubbing gadget out of a Brillo pad, a blender, and, let's say, some duct tape. But we're not really handy people in the Harris household, and despite its myriad uses, we don't keep duct tape around. I had to improvise, but my solution would make much worse television, because it involved a washing machine and a hair dryer, which is kind of lame. I sort of wish I experimented to see if the microwave might be a speedier way to dry laundry, sort of like it does for chicken, but I currently don't have a lot of underpants to spare. I will report, however, that the hair dryer was a lot slower than I thought it would be.